Ryan Air Flight 9432: this is NOT my happy face...

10.22.10

WARNING
This is completely a vent-blog.
About Ryan Air.
If that is in any way displeasing to you, feel free to skip to the next post.
I won't be offended, I promise. I might even laugh a little, and that will be so much more preferrable than my current mood...
Irritated, and wanting to hit something...like a wall.
...
OR just down espresso like its going out of style, and snarf down a chocolate muffin in under 2 seconds flat.
That works too.
    I've been checked for everything.
At every stastion.
    My contact solution that keeps my eyes from exploding got thrown away.
        My reliv lotion got trashed.
            And my toothpaste was tossed.
Toothpaste.
But Reliv that Caitlin said looked like cocaine in my individual bags, pepper spray, and a razor made it through.
...
SO
Lets explore this scenario, shall we?
    Due to Ryan Air's schitzophrenic tendencies with regards to rules and safety, I will now be a smooth-legged, flaky-elbowed, moldy-toothed, self-protected, bug-eyed crack addict during my stay in Italy.
Perfect.

    No, I do not understand how that works. But thank God that they didn't decide to terrorize me and actually weigh my backpack after a guy old enough to be my grandfather rifled through my underwear looking for more contraband toothpaste (and somehow missed the razor).  Because I'm fairly confident that it wouldn't have been under the weight limit.
     It's quite sad, actually. I was expecting them to weigh the backpack, and - in an attempt to decre3ase the (unknown) weight - I wore as many layers as I could stand. Two pairs of pants, and seven shirts later, and walking out onto the freezing tarmac at 6AM didn't bother me so much. Fancy that. All for naught, as that aspect of my carry-on was not contested. Figures.
    By the time they checked the size of my bulging backpack, I was so irritated that I shoved it into the bag-size-checker...thing using copious amoungs oof elbow grease, sheer determination and force of will, and a whole lot of help from a few beastly guardian Angels. Epic. Ask Caitlin though; the lady was a little disappointed that she didn't get to charge me another $60 for the bag being oversized.
     I needed a strong drink...
         Hence the double shot espresso. (gotcha)
    Although I did smile a bit, because only in Ireland would you be able to buy Guinness at a coffee shop.
    Sometimes I hate flying.
In any case, I will be in Italy in two hours and I can't wait. Hopefully once I'm on the ground, my horrific experience will be forgotten...even if I have to wipe it from my memory by force.
   By the way, the flight attendant just announced over intercom that smoking WAS prohibited, but if you wanted to smoke, you could buy cigarettes from the attendants, and THAT would be ok. I'm serious. I don't understand these people sometimes.
    *sigh*
Its much better now that I'm in motion.
   Although I haven't taken my Reliv yet today, and that makes me cranky. But hey, at least they let me take it with me, you know?
   My stress level is also decreased due to my unwinding via listening to Japanese music and Michael Bublè. Strange, but surprisingly effective.
   By the way, the sunrise over a sleeping Dublin is stunning. I'd take a pcture, but my camera is buried. Oops.
   And speaking of pictures, I'm going to guess that my total for the trip is going to come to around 1,300 pics. Just a guesstimation, you understand. Thank God for memory cards, laptops with SD slots, and extra batteries.
   I'll have to take a picture of Trevi fountain; four years ago, I tossed a coin over my left shoulder, and here I am again. Fancy that! :)
   First purchase upon arriving to Rome will be sunglasses for easier people-watching. Second purchase? A power converter for my laptop. Methinks I have a problem. Oh well, at least I'm happy with my current level of insanity.
   So, in the end, this wasnìt completely a rant-post, and for that I'm glad. I think the process of writing it down helps me calm down a bit...and maybe even laugh a little too, if I'm lucky.
   Here's to hoping that you managed to laugh a bit too. And if you are analyzing my insanity - as would be logical - just remember, you are friends with this...which basically means you are either laugning, shaking your head, or wishing you could be here in the empty plane seat next to me. Although, considering that we are friends, dear reader, chances are that its a combination of all three...
   I miss you too.
       And I'll say hi to Italy for you. :)
Wish me luck, ne?
   Grazie!

Much love -
   Me